I don’t like arguing with women in general, but with Laurel it’s like going to the dentist… on fire… and then being attacked by ninjas… who are also on fire.  Most women are good at pushing our buttons while we are at our angriest. I think Laurel takes this to the next level. I have never been more confused in my life then when I’m having an argument with her. Most of the times I forget why the argument started and just give up… or I apologize, for what I’m not really sure, but at this point I’m pretty sure I’m wrong about something.

Sometimes we have arguments where even in the beginning she’s not sure why she’s mad at me, but somehow three hours later, my brain is melted.

My theroy is this, I didn’t write many papers in college, I think the longest one was about 15 pages. I remember nothing from that paper, even what it was about, but I do remember the incredible level of stress that I had while writing it… and it took me weeks. Laurel can crank out a 15 page paper in 2 days. I’m not talking about 2 days of solid writing, I’m saying on the morning of day one she will start by PICKING A TOPIC and by the night of day 2 she will be done proofreading the paper… and she will get an A… in a masters program.  How am I supposed to go up against someone like that??? I have a degree in ART!

It’s like playing one-on-one with LeBron James, I may heave up a lucky bucket once in a while but most of the time he’s going to walk on my face while throwing down a reverse windmill slam.

She’s like the terminator of arguments. In a world where women have this ultimate weapon, Men, we are never going to win.

by the way,

I’m Sorry.