I think I just really wanted to use that title. But in the morning at work I am really interested in the cooking and eating of oatmeal. It could be that I’m still a little bit zombified from the early morning and the monotonous drive to work. But anyway the amusement is still genuine. When I put that bowl of water and dried oat flakes into the microwave it’s like watching a tiny volcano. But you mustn’t take your eyes off the bowl… you mustn’t… less you invoke the wrath of the weaponized oatmeal. Which is my idea for “non-lethal” but highly painful military weaponry. If they could just find a way to deliver this in mass quantities… on the glory of seeing foamy globs of molten oats pouring out of buildings full of insurgents. Also I would not recomend leaving a plastic fork in the oatmeal, sometimes the resulting mutilation is hard on the mouth. In closing… I love the smell of oatmeal in the morning.